I know it's not good, but I've got to say: the worse things get, the better I feel. It was that period of denial, those multiple attempts at re-opening and "going back to normal" when I felt the nost despondent. Now that things are getting really shitty I feel...I don't know, more alive?
I sort of enjoyed that it was everybody who were stuck at home, couldn't go to restaurants, couldn't go on exotic vacations, couldn't go to parties etc. Some of it was just enjoying how the world slowed down and became less noisy. Some of it was the feeling that finally there was a greater social project, something actually important that we were all working towards. The politicians were so scared that they cut out their racist bullshit and insufferable bickering for a while and listened to people who actually knew what they were talking about.
Some of it was also a sense of shared suffering. The nice explanation was that now everyone was stuck at home and couldn't have any fun, I no longer felt alone and like a freak for having lived like that most of my life. There was an awareness that living like this really sucks. The less nice explanation is good old-fashioned schadenfreude, finally all these spoilt pricks who have always
skated through life and looked down on people like me and made .e feel like shit for not being born with a silver spoon up my ass and a brain that didn't short-circuit whenever I am around other people were feeling just a little of what I have always been dealing with and these weak-ass fucks were absolutely loosing their minds over not being able to go to a restaurant.
Wasn't there some pop psychology thing about this? Something about how during horrible years in the 20th century, some people who normally felt horrible were feeling better?
There was a bit in Robert "IsAFed" Evans's It Could Happen Here about some studies conducted on people's mental health conditions improving and people having greater feelings of personal fulfillment during wartime but I cannot for the life of me remember any info specific enough to look up the studies to cite them.
oh yes I operate best in crisis conditions tbh. I like seeing people's various delusions about life now be aggressively shut down by reality. Too many people care about frivolous things that will soon not matter so much. I also hunger for the coming dawn so it's exciting when things look like they may collapse soon.
you know I don't even think I'm that pessimistic compared to doomers I just don't think people are going to be willing to challenge capitalism/the government until material conditions decay more. Once people wake up from the treat comas then we can finally get serious about tearing down and rebuilding society. The USA seems to be past stagnation now, things are actively getting worse and yet still no solution in sight... now the people are getting restless :sicko-yes:
with organization there are many exciting possibilities for the left in the future if we can seize them
Unironically, mentally preparing to live out the rest of my days on a barren, war-torn husk of a world is orders of magnitudes less depressing than mentally preparing to live out the rest of my days as a wage slave.
at least in the former I can have some sort of project healing the land/people post-cool zone. The latter is literally just exploitation until death so Zuckerberg gets enough money to build a Facebook-enabled Space Station
I know it's not good, but I've got to say: the worse things get, the better I feel. It was that period of denial, those multiple attempts at re-opening and "going back to normal" when I felt the nost despondent. Now that things are getting really shitty I feel...I don't know, more alive?
I sort of enjoyed that it was everybody who were stuck at home, couldn't go to restaurants, couldn't go on exotic vacations, couldn't go to parties etc. Some of it was just enjoying how the world slowed down and became less noisy. Some of it was the feeling that finally there was a greater social project, something actually important that we were all working towards. The politicians were so scared that they cut out their racist bullshit and insufferable bickering for a while and listened to people who actually knew what they were talking about.
Some of it was also a sense of shared suffering. The nice explanation was that now everyone was stuck at home and couldn't have any fun, I no longer felt alone and like a freak for having lived like that most of my life. There was an awareness that living like this really sucks. The less nice explanation is good old-fashioned schadenfreude, finally all these spoilt pricks who have always skated through life and looked down on people like me and made .e feel like shit for not being born with a silver spoon up my ass and a brain that didn't short-circuit whenever I am around other people were feeling just a little of what I have always been dealing with and these weak-ass fucks were absolutely loosing their minds over not being able to go to a restaurant.
They merely adopted the depression
Wasn't there some pop psychology thing about this? Something about how during horrible years in the 20th century, some people who normally felt horrible were feeling better?
"Misery loves company". If you're normally depressed and hopeless, seeing other people go nuts is a bit of a comfort.
:sicko-wistful:
There was a bit in Robert "IsAFed" Evans's It Could Happen Here about some studies conducted on people's mental health conditions improving and people having greater feelings of personal fulfillment during wartime but I cannot for the life of me remember any info specific enough to look up the studies to cite them.
That might have been where I first heard it.
oh yes I operate best in crisis conditions tbh. I like seeing people's various delusions about life now be aggressively shut down by reality. Too many people care about frivolous things that will soon not matter so much. I also hunger for the coming dawn so it's exciting when things look like they may collapse soon.
:sicko-hyper:
and it was ME who was the pessimist
you know I don't even think I'm that pessimistic compared to doomers I just don't think people are going to be willing to challenge capitalism/the government until material conditions decay more. Once people wake up from the treat comas then we can finally get serious about tearing down and rebuilding society. The USA seems to be past stagnation now, things are actively getting worse and yet still no solution in sight... now the people are getting restless :sicko-yes:
with organization there are many exciting possibilities for the left in the future if we can seize them
Unironically, mentally preparing to live out the rest of my days on a barren, war-torn husk of a world is orders of magnitudes less depressing than mentally preparing to live out the rest of my days as a wage slave.
at least in the former I can have some sort of project healing the land/people post-cool zone. The latter is literally just exploitation until death so Zuckerberg gets enough money to build a Facebook-enabled Space Station