The Palmer Raids were a series of raids conducted in November 1919 and January 1920 during the First Red Scare by the United States Department of Justice (DoJ) under the administration of President Woodrow Wilson. The raids targeted suspected leftists and labor activists, mostly Italian and Eastern European immigrants, especially if they were anarchists or communists, and generally sought to deport them from the United States.
The raids and arrests occurred under the leadership of Attorney General A. Mitchell Palmer, with more than 3,000 arrested. Though 556 people were deported, including many prominent leftist leaders like Emma Goldman, Palmer's efforts were largely frustrated by officials at the U.S. Department of Labor, which had authority for deportations and objected to methods.
On this day in 1920, the Justice Department launched its second series of raids against leftists and labor organizers across more than 23 states. Because the raids targeted entire organizations, agents engaged in mass arrests, and President Hoover later admitted that there were "clear cases of brutality".
Although the DoJ initially claimed to have taken possession of several bombs, no evidence of the bombs was produced. In their entirety, all the raids only confiscated four pistols.
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Depression absolutely has long term negative effects. As does trauma, especially in childhood. Fortunately, the brain seems to be very plastic and through difficult, intentional work, can be plied towards working in a way more conducive to mental health. At least that's what I've come to learn while searching for hope with my own neurological, mental-emotional issues. The analogy that I like the most is likening our mental state to grooves on a record. If you keep going down the same cognitive path, it's like a record player stuck in a groove, continuously making that groove deeper, making it more and more of the default state, and harder and harder to jump out. Your synaptic pathways are strengthened, the more you utilize them, and the harder it is to follow novel pathways. But that doesn't mean you're stuck forever in those pathways. You have to make a conscious and determined effort to build new pathways, make new grooves in the record, and use them repeatedly to strengthen those pathways, or deepen those grooves. It's hard work, but it pays off. Unfortunately, the "bad" pathways that have been carved out, will stay carved out. You have to be careful not to slip back into them, which is all too easy. Keep trying to find new grooves, keep building new synaptic pathways and keep trying to deepen and further carve out the good, healthy ones.
Anyway, I have similar problems with volition. I have pretty severe initiation deficit. (I have AvPD). So I really really hear you about the difficulty getting motivated to do anything. It's hard to even get myself to do things that I genuinely enjoy, even love doing. I wish there was some trick, some "hack" to just get out of that mindset. But I've found that mindset follows behavior, not the other way around. I mean, often you have to force yourself to do shit you don't want to do, do it even if you feel like you can't do it. And then the mindset that you can do it just might follow. For the record, I despise the "just do it" logic, and I know what I'm suggesting pretty much sounds like that. But there are subtle and important differences. You aren't "just doing" it, you're actively training your conditioned brain to make new grooves, to follow different pathways. It takes effort to dig out those new grooves, but the intentionality and dedication are the shovel.
I don't know. Probably corny and unhelpful, but it's what I tell myself as I try to work on the very kind of thing you're talking about. And I've had at least some success, even if it's still minor. Whatever the case, empathy and solidarity to you comrade.