I've been job hunting for a few months with zero luck. None of the jobs I wanted would even call me back. Well, frustrated and bored, I edited my resume to include all kind of falsehoods.

I added a bachelor's degreefrom a university that is now closed. I picked a field I could bullshit like I know what I'm talking about. I didn't tell them that the school was closed, and I figured it might be hard for them to verify this on their end since it's a bunch of extra steps to get the transcripts.

I changed my last job to an made up one. The job that I had been working is one that I'd honestly like to remove from my work history entirely. It's not that I think they'd give me a bad review, but that they were a sex toy/fetish item retailer. I actually loved working there, but I honestly don't want to have to explain this to my next employer. So I made up a similar company that is just an Amazon reshipper, gave it a google voice number that I controlled, and a made up address.

I changed a bunch of other smaller details, and gave myself a few awards.

And then I went applyin'. 3 days later I had an interview at a local small business. They sent out for an actual background check. I was a nervous wreck for almost a week, but I passed it. I start Monday.

The job I applied for didn't require any real accreditation, but they wanted a bachelor's in essentially anything. So I made one up. It's a small business that doesn't have an HR department. So I doubt they will ever dig any deeper as long as I never give them a reason to do so. They never called my actual last job, and they didn't bring it up in any of the interviews I went. They never even called the made up job with the fake number.

I guess what I'm saying is that to weigh your own risk here. If you think you can get away with it, give it a try. You might be surprised what happens.

  • Mehrunes_Laser [comrade/them, any]
    hexagon
    ·
    2 years ago

    That one comes with all the "small business owner" propaganda too. So they will probably look at it be awestruck by your tenacity and hard work.

    Come up with some idea for a small business that you can bullshit as the owner of, set up a squarspace website for it, call yourself successful, and start applying for real jobs. What are they gonna do, ask you for your business tax records to prove how successful you are? If they ask why you're appling for work, just tell the you're looking for some "stability in your workflow" and "miss the comradery of working with others." :data-laughing: