:no-dogs-no-masters:

look at that handsome bastard? i did that, dad. i always looked up to you. i always tried to defend you from the secret service goons, they're mean people, i could smell that from a mile away when we moved to washington. so i bit them. why is that a bad thing? they do worse than just biting people a bit, you know that. did you thank me for my watchfulness, dad? did you reward me for being a good dog and looking out for you? no. you sent Champ to the rat man and he never returned. you sent me back to Delaware and replaced me with a cat. after all i did for you. how could you? how could you do this to me? i cry to the moon every night, calling out for you, but you never answer my calls. i'm all alone here and you never respond.