I totally get trying to manage "if I'm going to be stuck focusing somewhere, here's a better place than most". It just looked like it was starting to get away from you at some points in this thread.

Also, I wanted to say that if you have to let yourself "disconnect entirely" from something and come back to it, you're not completely starting over, some of it does stick around, even if it doesn't feel like it. That's especially true when you've found a healthier outlet.