i hate all this fucking academic and therapy talk being used in ways that render them completely useless and meaningless. my breaking point was "emotional labor" and now hearing that a loving relationship is actually codependency from the same people who create mancaves to get away from their wives that they hate and children they ignore has made me the joker
It would also help a lot if we were allowed to live in walkable communities and work for a reasonable amount of hours each week. It’s so much harder to upkeep friendships that I would have used for emotional support in the past because everyone’s so fucking busy and far away all the time
Right, and that's entirely true. Women also perform the majority of even thinking about that stuff, which I think is what "mental load" (:hyperflush: ) means.
But my "emotional labor" beef is that as an academic term, it meant the performative commodification of emotions that, if deemed performatively inadequately, might lead to the loss of wages. Hochschild talked about emotional labour as being sold for a wage and having exchange-value. But now it means like, being happy that your partner got a raise instead of you. Or like, that your kid entrusts you with their emotional vulnerability.
It sucks because it’s basically the result of a shitty mental health system breaking down. If people’s mental health was given proper supports and resources, there would be no need to go on TikTok and self-dx and use potentially inaccurate terminology or info. But as it stands, self dx is the safest route for some people. And the culture of blaming individual people and trying to find “fakers” doesn’t help at all.
And then there’s just general language decay and all the intersectional baggage that comes with it. In the same way that “woke” lost its racial connotations amongst white Twitter libs, “emotional labor” lost its gendered and its class connotations. It’s all spectacle
i hate all this fucking academic and therapy talk being used in ways that render them completely useless and meaningless. my breaking point was "emotional labor" and now hearing that a loving relationship is actually codependency from the same people who create mancaves to get away from their wives that they hate and children they ignore has made me the joker
god that post was so infuriating. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP AND BE A PARENT YOU FUCKING CRETIN
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It would also help a lot if we were allowed to live in walkable communities and work for a reasonable amount of hours each week. It’s so much harder to upkeep friendships that I would have used for emotional support in the past because everyone’s so fucking busy and far away all the time
Right, and that's entirely true. Women also perform the majority of even thinking about that stuff, which I think is what "mental load" (:hyperflush: ) means.
But my "emotional labor" beef is that as an academic term, it meant the performative commodification of emotions that, if deemed performatively inadequately, might lead to the loss of wages. Hochschild talked about emotional labour as being sold for a wage and having exchange-value. But now it means like, being happy that your partner got a raise instead of you. Or like, that your kid entrusts you with their emotional vulnerability.
:marx-joker:
It sucks because it’s basically the result of a shitty mental health system breaking down. If people’s mental health was given proper supports and resources, there would be no need to go on TikTok and self-dx and use potentially inaccurate terminology or info. But as it stands, self dx is the safest route for some people. And the culture of blaming individual people and trying to find “fakers” doesn’t help at all.
And then there’s just general language decay and all the intersectional baggage that comes with it. In the same way that “woke” lost its racial connotations amongst white Twitter libs, “emotional labor” lost its gendered and its class connotations. It’s all spectacle