it's relatively easy for me to meet people online, but there's only so much i can get out of virtual friendships anymore.

  • Ideology [she/her]
    ·
    3 years ago

    RL relationships have been commodified such that, for most people, if you're not getting something out of the interaction the cost benefit analysis isn't worth it. Internet relationships are easier to form because there's no immediacy of the face to face. If I suddenly disappear, no one here will mourn my loss. If I decide to stop responding to messages there's already etiquette in place that you're not supposed to really do anything in those situations. It's very low barrier-to-entry and low effort.

    IRL you have to care about how you manage your attention, and for good relationships to form you should often be generous and unconcerned with transactions. But for most people that's too much work. In our society investments essentially necessitate returns, and returns in relationships are not guaranteed and never have been in human history.

    As for how to meet people irl? I dunno. My go-to strategy has been to thirst trap people into being friends. :volcel-judge: