One boomer was remarking about the rabbits and squirrels in their yard. The rabbits are there because we no longer have foxes because the boomers poison their yards. The squirrels are a food source for our at-risk birds of prey, while their ecological role spreading plant seeds adds to biodiversity and landscape regeneration in important ways. She called them "vile little creatures" and wished there was a way to kill them all.

The other's yard was 90% dedicated to Kentucky bluegrass. Purely ornamental, green concrete that's too poisonous for the rabbits to eat despite their effort. When I arrived she was pulling clover out of the only garden bed. When I left an hour later, she was still pulling cover out and asked if I could spray the bed with glyphosate to kill them. I said she might want to keep that species because it's important for pollinators and adds to the health of the soil for her other flowers. She opted for a $150 glyphosate treatment which makes the ground carcinogenic and takes two weeks to work.

I fucking hate these people. I hate their settler-colonialism toward nature, their sociopathic need for domination, and their utter tastelessness once they've achieved that domination at the expense of every other species that once lived in that yard. In this desert these deranged freaks will spend thousands of dollars per year to preserve their lawns. The violence behind their bullshit community fetish is only ignored because their neighbours are worse.

  • happybadger [he/him]
    hexagon
    ·
    2 years ago

    These are specifically the people so far in denial that they'll shell out for anything to preserve their lawn. I'm also doing their shrubs and trees so I can say things like "wow these roses are great. You should plant more", but anything which threatens them canceling lawncare services right after I've been there violates job security. Once I'm done with this season, I'm contracting myself out as a pollinator bolshevik though.

    • cynesthesia
      ·
      edit-2
      9 months ago

      deleted by creator

      • happybadger [he/him]
        hexagon
        ·
        2 years ago

        That business might be my next step. I took this because the parks department didn't call me in for an interview and the value of those properties looks good on a resume when I apply for something meaningful next year. I figure by the end of the summer I'll be able to walk onto any lawn, point out everything wrong with it, point out how much it will cost to fix any of that, and ramble about ecology until they shut up and give me money to replace it with something real. It's a Sinclair in the slaughterhouse kind of thing where I'll hopefully be able to stoke a healthy hatred by the end of it.

          • happybadger [he/him]
            hexagon
            ·
            2 years ago

            Irrigation tech pays better than my current gig so it's definitely on the table if I can't find a horticulture job at $20/hr.

    • Owl [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      I think a lot of suburbanites who might otherwise be happy with native plants are kept in line by wanting to look "normal" and "presentable" to their neighbors. So if you can come up with a planting scheme for your local area that's environmentally sane, while still being mostly green and low to the ground, I think you'd be able to get more people to hire you for pollinator bolshevism.

      (And obviously the people who want a full natural meadow are cooler than the above, and nothing will convince the "kill all the squirrels, poison the land!" people. I just think you can probably get a lot of people on board with mosses or clovers or whatever grows in your area.)