Asking for a friend (yes I mean this literally, I’m AMAB). I’m open to answers from AFAB people as well as links to first hand accounts.

  • Good_Username [they/them,e/em/eir]
    ·
    3 years ago

    If I knew the answer to that question, I would have figured out I was trans years before I actually did. It's a tricky one, especially when your period is heavy and painful, as mine was.

    Something I noticed really early is that no one had as much trouble as I did managing their period and not just bleeding everywhere or literally needing to take days off school in order to avoid bleeding everywhere. At the time I assumed my period was just way heavier than other people's, and that may still be true, but I suspect I also may have just let the bleedthrough happen more than necessary because I didn't want to think about it because of dysphoria. Hard to tell.

    Another thing about my period that I hated was that it would remind me I could conceivably get pregnant, and pregnancy has been abhorrent to me since I was old enough to realize it could happen to me someday. And I'm pretty sure that my fear and revulsion towards even the thought of pregnancy is because of dysphoria, although this revulsion has been with me for basically my whole life and doesn't really feel tied to any feelings of gender.

    So yeah, who knows? Working out whether your period is bad because periods suck or because of dysphoria is extremely difficult, in my experience.

    • CyberMao [it/its]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      If I knew the answer to that question, I would have figured out I was trans years before I actually did. It’s a tricky one, especially when your period is heavy and painful, as mine was.

      Oddly enough, my friend has a relatively light period. Only lasts a couple days and has a light flow. That’s one thing that she thought was odd because she knows women who have absolutely awful periods but still aren’t as upset about having them.

      Another thing about my period that I hated was that it would remind me I could conceivably get pregnant, and pregnancy has been abhorrent to me since I was old enough to realize it could happen to me someday. And I’m pretty sure that my fear and revulsion towards even the thought of pregnancy is because of dysphoria, although this revulsion has been with me for basically my whole life and doesn’t really feel tied to any feelings of gender.

      She said she feels most like a woman while pregnant and really enjoys the experience, but hates the way that people are misogynistic to pregnant women in particular.

      So yeah, who knows? Working out whether your period is bad because periods suck or because of dysphoria is extremely difficult, in my experience

      I appreciate you sharing. I know it’s not something I can just find simple solutions to, but the only trans experiences that actually showed up in my initial google were part of a vice article, so this is very helpful.

  • PapaEmeritusIII [any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Like the other poster said, it’s a tricky question to answer. But I can share some of my personal experience with dysphoria as an AFAB person.

    For me, there is kind of a distinction between disliking part of my body and feeling dysphoric about part of my body, though it’s not always obvious what I’m feeling in the moment. If I just dislike something, it’s like “ah, this part of me is annoying and has these frustrating drawbacks that I have to deal with,” whereas dysphoria is more like “this is wrong and should not be a part of me.”

    For example, I’m not a fan of periods and I’d prefer not to have one, but my periods don’t make me dysphoric. They’re annoying and serve me no purpose, since I’m never getting pregnant, but they don’t feel wrong. They’re just an annoying thing that I put up with. At least they’re a nice reminder that I’m not pregnant.

    The thought of getting pregnant, on the other hand, gives me dysphoria. Which is why I got sterilized as soon as I could. The fact that I was capable of getting pregnant felt like my body was betraying me, and getting my fallopian tubes removed felt like fixing an error. Fertility felt wrong.

    There are a couple other parts of my body that I have sort of on-and-off dysphoria about. Like boobs, for instance. Sometimes I see them in the mirror and am like what the fuck are those doing there (dysphoria). Sometimes I enjoy them, and I wear things that accentuate them, even if I’m not going anywhere. Sometimes they’re a nuisance (it’s uncomfortable to run without a bra), but they still feel like a part of me.