I don't even drop my suit pants to urinate. I just soil myself. If Wall Street calls to make a deal and I'm in the bathroom, that extra three seconds you'd take to unzip your pants is three seconds where I'm getting wet and rich.

  • happybadger [he/him]
    ·
    2 years ago

    I'm so successful because I'm an entrepreneur. I take every opportunity to get rich fast and speculate on anything. If I'm at a Wendy's trying to haggle for used fries, I'll ask the worker "How much do you get paid in an hour? I'll bet you that much there are more than 7 fries left in that container you're about to throw away." Now I get calories and cash just for being bold and taking risks. You don't take risks and that's why you'll never have as many fries as me.