men can be loving and caring, men can be nurturing, men have just as many instincts around children as women do, men can be gentle and kind, all soft and sweet traits appear in men just as much as women, men are not what society says we are. Children do well with good male role models. being a man does not mean being a monster. being a man can be beautiful and elegant. there is nothing wrong or evil about being a man.
I often tell folks that I don't know what 'being a man' even means for this reason. Everything that they mention as being something only men do, I've seen women do, and vice versa. I'm not even convinced that 'men' and 'women' exist outside cultural roles, which vary across human experience to render the distinction pointless. We're all just people, some of us have pipes that go in, some that go out. We also sometimes have different hair colors, eye colors, skin tones, etc. As ridiculous as it is to think that skin tone has anything to do with someone's behavior, maybe it's also true that it's silly to denote behavior to one's piping?
I suppose trans folks have a better understanding here so I'd be glad to fill in any knowledge gaps with book recommendations. Trans Liberation was pretty good but it was written for an earlier time, I feel (the struggle carries on though). I suspect Judith Butler's writings might have some nuggets of knowledge but I haven't read anything yet.
That’s a very good point. It made me think that a better question rather than what is a man or a woman, is what makes a good person. If the traits one considers manly/womanly are not in line with being a good and happy person, then why are they traits to strive towards at all?
men can be loving and caring, men can be nurturing, men have just as many instincts around children as women do, men can be gentle and kind, all soft and sweet traits appear in men just as much as women, men are not what society says we are. Children do well with good male role models. being a man does not mean being a monster. being a man can be beautiful and elegant. there is nothing wrong or evil about being a man.
don't drop your crown, king.
I often tell folks that I don't know what 'being a man' even means for this reason. Everything that they mention as being something only men do, I've seen women do, and vice versa. I'm not even convinced that 'men' and 'women' exist outside cultural roles, which vary across human experience to render the distinction pointless. We're all just people, some of us have pipes that go in, some that go out. We also sometimes have different hair colors, eye colors, skin tones, etc. As ridiculous as it is to think that skin tone has anything to do with someone's behavior, maybe it's also true that it's silly to denote behavior to one's piping?
I suppose trans folks have a better understanding here so I'd be glad to fill in any knowledge gaps with book recommendations. Trans Liberation was pretty good but it was written for an earlier time, I feel (the struggle carries on though). I suspect Judith Butler's writings might have some nuggets of knowledge but I haven't read anything yet.
That’s a very good point. It made me think that a better question rather than what is a man or a woman, is what makes a good person. If the traits one considers manly/womanly are not in line with being a good and happy person, then why are they traits to strive towards at all?
This means a lot. Thank you.
Of course, comrade.