Well, yes, wanting a relationship in the abstract isn't an issue.
The issue is a lot of people raised masc come in to flirting with a sense of "I want a relationship with anyone hot enough who'll have me" and that is a massive turn off. We're not fucking interchangeable, flirt with us because you like us.
Because you think our hair or our music or our clothes or the way we hold ourselves is cool
Don't "want a relationship". Be "ready for a relationship" and "want a relationship with that specific person, over there, who you have preferably talked to casually a couple of times and it went well."
There's also the idea that most relationships start online or while clubbing. They don't, they start by meeting aquaintances at house gatherings or bored at conferences or in hobbies (want to meet leftist lgbt friendly people in a setting which heightens emotions? Join your amateur theatre club)
This feeds into the general idea, you need to find a place with a lot of people unfamiliar enough that you can display interest, but familiar enough that you can regularly talk to them and ask friends to hit you up for info.
I see. Well, that does make things harder for you and I'm really sympathetic to the difficulties that non-alloromantic people have.
But if you find someone really interesting for non romantic reasons, and they are romantically attracted to you, then you can have the experience of a romantic relationship without having to feel deep alloromantic attraction for them.
But there's no shortcut to that, so I think my advice still applies.
Well, yes, wanting a relationship in the abstract isn't an issue.
The issue is a lot of people raised masc come in to flirting with a sense of "I want a relationship with anyone hot enough who'll have me" and that is a massive turn off. We're not fucking interchangeable, flirt with us because you like us.
Because you think our hair or our music or our clothes or the way we hold ourselves is cool
Don't "want a relationship". Be "ready for a relationship" and "want a relationship with that specific person, over there, who you have preferably talked to casually a couple of times and it went well."
There's also the idea that most relationships start online or while clubbing. They don't, they start by meeting aquaintances at house gatherings or bored at conferences or in hobbies (want to meet leftist lgbt friendly people in a setting which heightens emotions? Join your amateur theatre club)
This feeds into the general idea, you need to find a place with a lot of people unfamiliar enough that you can display interest, but familiar enough that you can regularly talk to them and ask friends to hit you up for info.
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I see. Well, that does make things harder for you and I'm really sympathetic to the difficulties that non-alloromantic people have.
But if you find someone really interesting for non romantic reasons, and they are romantically attracted to you, then you can have the experience of a romantic relationship without having to feel deep alloromantic attraction for them.
But there's no shortcut to that, so I think my advice still applies.