Edit - fuck. I had used the wrong link.
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I need you to listen to the deeply broken text-to-speech narration from this Google blog post. They removed it after people pointed out how bad it was, but I promise you this was actual audio on a real official Google blog post.
https://bsky.app/profile/cdrom.ca/post/3koacpoqf362u
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cohost! - "Real "I broke IKEA" vibes on the "listen to article" button for this Google blog post"
Somehow the cadence of that first one reminded me of Kronii once it starts stuttering about halfway through even though the voice doesn't sound like her when reading normally