they’re all dudes who worked as janitors or accountants and lived in places like Sheboygan WI and seemed to just putter around for most of their lives, never traveling, never getting into any interesting hobbies, never pursing any kind of career.

But enough about Hexbear. For real though, that's just 99% of us. The book 'Stoner' was a documentary.

So the secret to not going insane is to touch grass

they become more pitiable

That is not the word I would use. Pathetic? I think pathetic would fit. But I've never felt any pity for them.