Jade helm was hilarious. I was actually staying in Bastrop when that was going on and the local chud paranoia was amazing. They're already paranoid because Bastrop chuds craft their entire identity as being different than those Austin liberals. I remember people filling up parking lots blasting weird country music or evangelical hymns. People had signs in their yards encouraging everyone go stockpile guns and ammo.

If I were actually afraid of these people I'd have been alarmed, but they did nothing, nothing happened, and yet they all treated like a victory. Like they ran out that nasty federal government by...driving their trucks around and rolling coal everywhere.

I'm more into the conspiracy theory that jade helm was an exercise for some kind of largescale environmental disaster or infrastructure collapse. That's why it was focused on holing up in Wal-Marts, which are often the largest and most connected structures in rural/suburban areas.