• DefinitelyNotAPhone [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      Arguably the most important thing to know about top/bottom or dom/sub relationships (other than the omnipresent "safe, sane, consensual") is that ultimately the person on bottom has all the actual power because the top/dom can't do shit unless they agree to it.

      Obviously it's healthier to think of it as an equivalent relationship, but I feel like that phrasing makes it clear to shitheads who wants to dom what's actually going on.

      • invo_rt [he/him]
        ·
        edit-2
        2 years ago

        I'm a top and it's the same thing with oral. The one performing oral is holding all the cards and I'm just along for the ride. :edgeworth-shrug:

      • Grownbravy [they/them]
        ·
        2 years ago

        Designating the size and rules of the playing field is important and also a part of the fun.