I drink my venti starbucks iced chai with oat milk, three pumps brown sugar syrup, and caramel creamer.

The last time I had a medium-well steak I spit it out because it was too raw for me.

The only workouts I do are to get a bigger ass.

I eat my vegan chicken tendies straight out of the freezer.

I'll gag if I don't mix my Bud Light with mountain dew or apple juice.

I refuse to buy any beverage not clearly labelled that it was imported from a foreign adversary.

I make it a habit to forcefully crush my balls between my legs to get better at CBT.

I can't go to bed before I watched a boytoy twink being destroyed by 11 inches.

I have no sexual attraction for arachnids.

I am a sigma they/them individual, and no, I will NEVER apologize.