Yeah well when you just don't fucking fit and you don't have a lot of options collapsing into a sort of lethargic despair is probably the one that is least painful

There's really not a lot of sympathy out there for the socially awkward. Awareness, sure, but nobody's willing to deal with us. I've been self-isolating for years and am still low-key terrified of interacting with other people, which is a thing I have to do every single day at my job.