Eldtritch has gone stale everybody, we're all thinking it! I'm so tired of hearing about "summoning" a creature from " la most terrible and tenebris maw" why does everything have a maw? What the fuck is a maw? Give me a grimoire that summons a goblin that looks like a ciao ciao that does my taxes or some shit.
Just open Deliveroo to quickly summon a wretched and oppressed creature whose pitiful state is only matched by it's shocking banality.
I do self-criticism constantly because I’m trapped in a Maoist cult where comrades (white terrorists) criticize me mercilessly for having a fascist credit card (VISA Silver Signature Rewards)
They won’t let me invoke elemental spirits from the astral plane anymore because the phone is fascist and "summoning my daemonic slaves with a bourgeois app" is "bad vibes"