I found an exploit in the code and I've just been using it to randomly shift values of data every now and then causing consistent but unpredictable results.

It's a concept in chaos theory called synchronicity. Sometimes it shifts the data out of place, causing slowdowns in higher amounts. But eventually it shifts back into place. Or given enough time, an even better place for the performance of the site. I figured blind evolution would be a quicker path to stability as opposed to slow design. The growing pains suck though I'll admit.