It seems a lot of people absolutely despise the idea of spending any of their free time with their coworkers, even something as measly as a lunch break that you're basically stuck at work for anyways. I could understand it if your coworkers were particularly nasty to you or something like that, but it seems that a lot of people have fine relationships with their coworkers and still would rather sit in a car alone to eat lunch rather than having a conversation at a table or go home after work and watch TV rather than get a beer or coffee.

I can understand people want to hide or whatever, but why is that such a widespread phenomenon now? It wasn't always like that as I understand. From a lot of what I've read and heard, fairly intimate relationships between coworkers were much more common. It seems like if we're talking about the general breakdown of society or the decay of the labor movement, this is an obvious symptom that doesn't seem to have anyone's attention. So what gives?

  • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]
    ·
    2 years ago

    I think there are several reasons:

    1. Coworkers remind people of their shitty job. They are stressed and need time away from socializing for hours on end.

    2. The coworkers have nothing in common with them or have political beliefs that clash

    3. The modern workplace encourages a competitive relationship between coworkers, meaning that coworkers actively sabotage one another while pretending to be friendly

    Seriously, in one job, a coworker whom I thought was my friend found out I'm triggered by sexual assault, so they started telling me about sexual assault stories every day until I was a nervous wreck and it impacted my work. Then I overheard them rat me out to the boss for vaguely suggesting unionization with someone else who wasn't being paid properly.

    • kristina [she/her]
      ·
      2 years ago

      i would beat someone to death if they did that to me tbh

    • hexaflexagonbear [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      :jesus-christ: i know HR isn't your friend, but I would've reported the SA talk. The fact you were triggered by it and your coworker knew makes it much worse, but that's something that doesn't belong at work either way.

      I think your list is spot on also, generally the things that make me uneasy about work friendships (and I'm actually pretty social at work).

    • wtypstanaccount04 [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      Seriously, in one job, a coworker whom I thought was my friend found out I’m triggered by sexual assault, so they started telling me about sexual assault stories every day until I was a nervous wreck and it impacted my work. Then I overheard them rat me out to the boss for vaguely suggesting unionization with someone else who wasn’t being paid properly.

      :stalin-gun-1::stalin-gun-2:

      Jesus fuck that's evil