I talked to my boss when I first got hired about being pregnant and doing my job. It was a very physical job with long hours and could be quite dirty, but many women did it pregnant. He agreed with me that pregnancy was no hindurance to the job. For over a year I talked about becoming pregnant and he assured me it was okay. On the day I was supposed to fly out to meet the parents, he informed me that he would let me go if I went. I had my shift covered, everything was in line. I was dumb founded when he said that if I thought he was going to let me work there pregnant I was wrong. All that time he had been fine with it. So I prodded, trying to find out what changed his mind. His wife even did the same job while she was pregnant with their son! His response was "but she didn't sell the baby." He wouldn't let me explain, talk to him, or show him why he was wrong. He just told me to leave. I loved working there until that day and no amount of money could have brought me back after that. Selling my baby?? So far from the truth!
Based leftist boss fighting against human trafficking?? :so-true:
I mean, I gotta admit, like if someone's boss found out they were involved in selling children off to Little St. James and fired them, and I doubt anyone would fault them for it. And based on the thread we had the other day, it seems like a lot of this site believes that surrogacy is "literally buying babies" or equivalent to Murray Rothbard's "free market for infants" - or at least, a bunch of you think that's a reasonable position to have. So I'm curious if any of the 50 or so people who upbeared that thread see any problem with that boss's decision to fire his pregant worker for, as you would agree, "selling her baby." I'm curious to know if you'd make the same decision in his shoes, and if you see any problem with that situation - other than of course, that he couldn't hand her over to the cops as well.
I guess I'm just trying to better understand your positions. Like, is this something that you actually believe, or is it a superficial, exaggerated rhetorical flourish that you know is bullshit but use anyway because it provides a pretext for infringing on women's rights? You know, like "abortion is murder?"
I also wouldn't mind hearing from some centrists and moderates on the issue. Those who think both sides have a point, between, "Surrogate mothers are engaging in human trafficking by returning a child to their biological parent," and, "Surrogate mothers have a right to bodily autonomy." Is there one side that you think is more reasonable, or are you a true centrist, right in the middle of those two, equally extreme positions?
While I'm at it, I'd also like to open up the discussion more broadly. Is there anything else women's bodies do that you think is immoral, or maybe just plain gross? Anything else you think ought to be illegal? I'm really looking to hear from some men here, because I feel like we never get their perspective on that.
Anti-surrogacy is just anti-choice for anti-natalists.
I understand when I am and am not doing something with a material impact. We are on a website with 200 concurrent users. I'm a burnt out, overworked researcher. I know that I don't need to read a study when the class dynamics are this transparent. And do you know what happens when I'm wrong? I change my mind. You're giving me shit because you're angry more people haven't researched this and don't want to. I don't need to change my mind because I don't and won't have political power over surrogates. If it becomes an issue where I need research to point to people for them to believe me, that's when I look it up. I have yet to be in a situation where I couldn't find some. I center human beings empathetically as a moral center, and that has yet to steer me wrong in my understanding of the likely nature of abuses on the basis of class, race, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, etc. Now what are you going to say to the person that did actually have the bandwidth to go find some good evidence of surrogacy tourism? You gonna shit all over them too? I'm sorry people in your life need to have data to empathize with people who are vulnerable, but I've learned to empathize without that data.
I totally respect not doing the research on in when you not doing something with a material impact. I do. I imagine that's most of the people on this site in regards to the topic. But in my opinion, in that case, it's better to just reserve judgement and stay out of the fray.
I do apologize that I've been abrasive in this thread. As I've mentioned, I'm quite frustrated because, when I asked for sources previously, people attacked me without providing any, and when I found my own, and asked directly if they had any better sources that would refute what I found, I got more of the same. In this thread, you've weighed in to criticize my pursuit of information, and that caused me to get frustrated with you.
Now, thankfully, I have finally, finally received what I originally asked for, which is some source, just any amount of evidence whatsoever so I can see if there is any truth to what the people I've been arguing with have been saying. I am certainly not going to shit on the one person to finally provide something to back up their claims, obviously. But I don't know how I'll respond yet because I'm still reading through them.
I think, rather than "empathize," you mean "sympathize." I've been arguing for listening and learning from vulnerable people, not just feeling pity for them. Yes, I do need to collect data about what they express and how they feel in order to understand and empathize with them, because that's part of what empathy is, fundamentally.
I hope I can be clear that from my perspective, commenting on the class divisions at play and leaving it at that is what constitutes reserving judgment and staying out of it.
Fair enough. I apologize for the same. I don't think you have come across as actually seeking further knowledge. Rather, you seemed to be attacking me rhetorically for not having a study or a testimony to specifically point at, which does constitute a bad faith form of argument. I realize you're heated because of some people saying unhinged shit in that other thread, but it really did not seem like you actually wanted some real examples, and I'm way too autistic to not just keep arguing a point on merits I think are reasonable.
I think perhaps I mean something in between then, because you are correct that I am simply and fundamentally unable to empathize with them because I cannot experience surrogacy myself, but I also don't simply feel pity for them. My feeling toward the vulnerable is a sympathetic solidarity. It's the same as my feeling of solidarity with historical socialist projects, and with existing socialist projects.
I do appreciate that, and I should've taken that into consideration more than I did. I singled you out for a broader trend of people weighing in with various takes without having anything to back it up - something that the format of the internet encourages, and which I find frustrating (especially in the context of women's rights) - but it was unfair considering that your take is very restrained. I'm sorry for that.