notable bits:
crowder filed for divorce
he was not present for the birth of his children
he moved out like before they were even home really
he was clearly abusive the whole time
notable bits:
crowder filed for divorce
he was not present for the birth of his children
he moved out like before they were even home really
he was clearly abusive the whole time
Of course. I try to make it empathetic to people who have been harmed and emotionally repressed without excusing the harm they might do to others. Because I don’t think making excuses is fair to people who have hurt in similar ways and not lashed out.
I mean what the hell else are you supposed to do though? Be a martyr on a cross for a society that doesn't give a shit?
I have little interest in being anybody's sacrificial lamb.
Mind you that's not a "defense" of Crowder here. His badgering of his eight month pregnant wife is both baffling, and loathsome to myself.
More just an interrogation of whatever point you're trying to make.
Maybe “lashing out” was a bad choice a words. It’s not the job of people who have been abused to never lash out at anyone. I meant more like not everyone becomes an abuser themselves. Not everyone perpetuates those patterns of behavior.
Hmm; that's fair.
TBH, the question of "what are you supposed to do?" Is more than just a rhetorical one for me. I am in a stochastic process of trying to figure out how get my own needs met without just imposing them on others these days. It hasn't generally been an option beforehand.
That’s a difficult process for sure. It’s one that would normally be spread out through an entire childhood and people try to speedrun it in a matter of months or a few years. I don’t know if you were literally asking for an answer to the question, but I can’t say much without more context. Either way, I hope it’s been going well for you so far.
Yeah... That's sort of what I mean; it is in fact something that I'm going to have to "speedrun". Because neither the expression of my own needs or interests, nor the ability to have them reliably met, was something that actually existed for most of my life growing up.
My work has gotten me set up with what I believe is a pretty good therapist, he actually bothered to put me through some actual clinical diagnostic evaluations, and I apparently have a lot more going on than what I initially thought. So, I have something to work on, and a way to develop tools for that rn.
For sure. And to be clear, I didn’t intend to make light of that need to catch up quickly. I’m doing the same thing.
That’s awesome to hear! I relate to the experience of having a lot more going on than anticipated. Having a good therapist really does make a world of difference, there.