imperialism is actually caused by a parasitic fungus whose reproductive cycle requires it to be eaten by humans while it's in olives and olive oil, like toxoplasmosis but instead of making mice unafraid of cats it makes humans willing to eat at an olive garden
My conspiracy theory that has no conspiracy is that since a ton of humans have toxoplasmosis, it affects humans too and that’s why people get so rabid over their love for cats. Don’t get me wrong, kitties are cute, but they’re not the end all be all of animals like some people make them seem, and they’re not uniquely cute. I like birds more than cats, personally.
There's a story/myth about the spanish colonist ordering the cut of every olive tree growing in America cuz they were competing with the olive producers in Spain. Allegedly Carlos 3 did the thing, but there is no paper record of it.
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The US is just a hivemind controlled by soy and corn. We must raze the earth to make more space for soy and corn. Fill in the oceans so we have more space for soy and corn. Glaze over the moon so we have more room for soya and corn. Extinguish the sun with soy and corn. The whole universe will become soy and corn.
