I was kind of passively monogamous until hooking up with a polyamorous woman on Tinder. I started a relationship with her and even though I made some attempts at dating other people, this mostly just became her having sex with other guys and me being involved with her exclusively. But I found out that I have zero jealousy, like none at all, as long as she had the time and attention for me. I found out a lot about myself that I didn't expect.
So, anyway, I wanted to create a thread about positive experiences with polyamory, due to a thread on the test instance.
My wife and I have always held the door open for the potential of her dating a woman since she's bi, and the only hangup for me was if she wanted to date a man / make me feel replaced. Fast forward a bit and we have a number of nonmonogamous friends and we agree that's a possibility but don't really act on it. Fast forward more and she meets a guy who is very much like me lol but thinks he's amazing. We have a hard transitionary period with a lot of big feelings (anger, fear, sadness) but now we're in a pretty good place: we're communicating more and more honestly, when we spend time together it's because we're choosing to not because it's the only/default option, I'm going on dates and she's seeing this guy and they're super cute together. When someone's upset there's often more people around to help. Even before we opened up, we learned a lot about healthy relationships from our polyamorous friends. The monogamy sold to us by tv, movies, jewelry commercials, reality tv, religion, and our parents is not exactly a super healthy way to live.
Highly recommend for anyone looking into things, or even for monogamous people trying to improve their relationship are the Multiamory podcast and the PolySecure book. It sounds specific but it's really about communication and attachment styles.