I was kind of passively monogamous until hooking up with a polyamorous woman on Tinder. I started a relationship with her and even though I made some attempts at dating other people, this mostly just became her having sex with other guys and me being involved with her exclusively. But I found out that I have zero jealousy, like none at all, as long as she had the time and attention for me. I found out a lot about myself that I didn't expect.
So, anyway, I wanted to create a thread about positive experiences with polyamory, due to a thread on the test instance.
Poly isn't for everyone. It sounds like you might not ever be comfortable with it, or it might just take time, talking and thinking to change your perspective.
Personally I don't care how my partner spends their time. It doesn't matter if it's knitting or fucking.
If you aren't getting enough time with your partner to meet your needs you should talk to them about it or look for someone that will meet your needs.
Comparing yourself to past or other relationships is never gonna feel good. Each relationship (including platonic) you have with someone is special and different in its own way, isn't it?