I've probably been exhibiting alcoholism for 12 years. I've been able to keep it hidden from most people I know, but since I moved in with a romantic partner, it's been more obvious to both me and them. I need to change, and I've been unsuccessful for my entire adult life. It got worse starting in 2020, for obvious reasons.
I'm hesitant to bring this up to doctors. I've heard and read stories about organ transplant recipients being actively rejected (by doctors/social workers refusing to go forward, not in the medical sense of rejection of organ donation) because of expressing tendencies toward mental health issues (suicide, drug addiction). I don't want to tell a doctor or social worker that I'm an alcoholic because there is a built-in stigma against anyone like me. So, I tell them I drink socially.
I want to go to AA, but there's some christianity built into it. It's not something I could tolerate with a straight face, which would impact my recovery. I'm open to suggestions about how I can seek help.
Psilocybe mushrooms can work for things like addictions where you need to build up the resolve in an 8 hour unescapable period of intense introspection. It can also work against the depression. You can grow it yourself and order the spores legally in most US states. You have to respect the meaning of "set and setting" though.