Fuck they're good
It's my birthday today, so I'm going to make a couple of Wisconsin style beer brats to celebrate another year of not dying
Thank you very much, it has been an extremely eventful year and I am just glad I got friends, family and well-wishers out there being cool like you
This is the real shit. Load up some sauerkraut on there with some spicy brown mustard and you've got yourself a real treat.
Goddamn, I knew I forgot something
Can't have brats without kraut
Please my good sir, one dirty bratwurst for me is all I'm asking.
No problem. Just don't bite too hard or all the dirt juice will pop out and ruin ur shirt.
When I was a kid my uncle got the sausages that just had like cheapo American cheese inside them for a family get-together and they blew my mind
It's like the first time you get a hot dog and realize you can put Cheez Whiz on it
It might shorten your life significantly, but you're a kid, that doesn't matter
Just processed slop on processed tubes, overwhelming your tastes buds through sheer force of salt and fat
Yes, it's all chemically designed to send the dopamine signal to my brain
I am but a monkey mashing the button on my skinner box
Wisconsin guy here, and I regret to inform you that Johnsonville is a shit company run by fascists and I refuse to support them. I do remember the brats being great though. At least I can get better ones at the local butcher
They were big Scott Walker supporters when he was destroying public unions in Wisconsin. I had assumed that also translated into Trump support but it actually looks like they haven't publicly supported anything political in a while, so I guess I'm just showing my age
I have a lizard brain fear reaction to potentially molten food after burning my mouth one too many times.
