trump and really think this way it's fucking impossible. after the 90s and after eight years of shitting obama and then four years of all this shit you still think republicans will step up and do the right thing you're not even getting votes you dumb motherfucker you're a fucking writer goddamn fucking idiot.

  • Classic_Agency [he/him,comrade/them]
    ·
    4 years ago

    This is so dumb but I felt I would be doing a disservice by not posting it:

    The year is 1952, the Soviet politburo are in a meeting related to planning the 19th congress of the CPSU Stalin and co are sitting in the Kremlin Senate, having discussions and planning what to do. All of a sudden a young Mikhail Gorbachev bursts through the door to the meeting room, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. "Listen up everyone, I have an announcement to make" he bellowed.

    He then looks straight at Stalin with a smug look on his face and says: "Mr Stalin, sir, your fired."

    Everyone in the room looks at each other with shocked looks on their faces. Stalin, wide eyed, removes his pipe from his mouth.

    "Excuse me." said Stalin, "what did you just say?"

    "Comrade" said Gorbachev

    "Your fired"

    Audible gasps emit from everyone in the room. How was a mere rank and file communist party member able to declare the General Secretary "fired"?

    Stalin then stands up and says "Comrades, it appears that our weaknesses have been exposed. Never in all of my time as general secretary has anyone, let alone a rank and file CPSU member, been able to sucessful challenge the rule of the communist party. But now given that we are being openly challenged by the rank and file right here and right now, I'm afraid we have no choice but to resign from our positions or face humiliation."

    The rest of the politburo groans in resignation. They start standing up to leave.

    Stalin looked at Gorbachev and said "You are now the general secretary of the Communist party of the Soviet Union, I hope you know what you are doing."

    "Yes comrade I do" said Gorbachev, half seriously.

    The next day the Soviet Union is declared over and capitalism and bourgeois democracy are to be implemented in the USSR and eastern block countries. The newly formed Russian Republic joins NATO and allows American corporations to loot the country for resources. Gorbachev becomes the CEO of a pizza food chain and dies a multi millionaire.

    The End