I was kinda on a nostalgia trip and I stumbled on Jennifer Lopez's Waiting for Tonight, and it's basically about how she wants to fuck her partner. It could be more romantic in nature, and for some people it is, but looking at the repression in the West, it's very racy for its time.
But I ask: Why is it considered bad for straight men to want to listen to a song about how a woman wants to fuck? Volcel Pledge, notwithstanding.
I mean I know the answer is systemic misogyny, but like it doesn't even make sense?
It's so bizarre to me as a queer person attracted to men that men and boys are discouraged from listening to musicians who are women.
I'd have loved growing up with musicians I'm attracted to who were attracted to my gender.
I sorta want to explore this experience as an outsider, but I'm curious, what was that like? Did you listen to artists you liked in secret? How are your music tastes now? Any recommendations on music that feels different on a revisit?
At the time, I never even realized the gendered aspect of it. Although that was definitely going on, I never thought of it is "it's not cool for me to listen to this cuz I'm a boy," I thought "this is garbage, I only listen to REAL music." And what that was changed from classical, to classic rock, to metal, to hardcore punk as I went from child to teen (there are some cool aspects to punk/hardcore, but the scene also had a huge misogyny problem, a lot of rejecting mainstream dudebro norms to be a misogynist dudebro in a different way). I never listened to anything in secret, I thought I was listening to the only music worth listening to.
My music tastes now are very broad, I listen to a lot and I love looking for and finding new artists, new genre to get into, etc.