As in, absolutely no "close" friend, because turns out one was an absolute cunt, the other one simply didn't seem to care at all. No family either because I've met with a man contaminated with coronavirus, and had to isolate myself to protect my parents. Nor any significant other because of various factors that I won't get into.
So that's it. 2020 is the first year where I literally have no one left to talk/confess to. As a gift, I am offered a fucking coronavirus test, and that'll probably be it. I can't even cry anymore, because I feel so numb. I wonder if anyone has truly delved so deep into misanthropy as I did., becaues as it turns out, finding decent people to talk to is an actual nightmare, and I just can't be arsed anymore to go back to Tinder/Okcupid, or to hang out with my classmates. So loneliness for the foreseeable future it is.
That's it, I posted this here because there's no mental health sub, god fucking knows why. Have a good night, because I sure as hell won't.
Ok I'm legit amazed at the amount of answers, thank you all, you beautiful liberals. I'll try to answer to all of you.
That's surely a far more positive way to look at things compared to how I tend to view them currently. Yet I can't help but think that once I get rid of depression and all of my ills, I'll remain a nihilist regardless, considering how insignificant and devoid of meaning everything seems to be, at least at the time I'm writing this. I can only hope the LSD will do its job and help me save myself.
But anyway, thank you.
Nihilism can be freeing too - if everything is insignificant and meaningless you're pretty much free, the typical pressures & stresses of life shouldn't burden you. Peak nihilism you can just skip out on anything to go listen to the birds instead, fuck it. It's totally meaningless & simultaneously its all the meaning we've got. If LSD teaches you anything it's surely that we're all connected.. The idea of seperation is a joke & a curse, we're all results of the various conditions we find ourselves of & in.
Prolly never get rid of all the ills, we've all got our battles to fight & everyone has different weights bogging em down, hangups, you name it.
Join an org, helping others is really something and building community and actually putting tangible effort towards making a world that more reflects justice, equality, freedom, solidarity... It feels good. It's empowering.
Also obligatory eat right & exercise to the best of your abilities - I get bogged down & have to drag my ass out of depressive holes. I'll be depressedly exercising for a few days wanting to die and after a week the metabolism kicks in & the good brain drugs kick in. It's like a fucking jump start to my broken assed brain.
We need you, the world needs you. You're doing great, shits fucking hard right now & we must persevere. We've got to build coolitions & rise above and resist despair. Demand a better world, fight for a better world, make a better world. Plant a fuckin tree or two!
Welcome to 24 friend, excited to see what you get up to. We're all in this together and WE'RE GOING TO GROW OUR HUMANITY TOGETHER.
Nihilism is dope, my brother is a total nihilist and he's by far the best person I've ever met. He's turned it into a sort of zen superpower, just the right amount of detachedness to extract brilliant takes & never get too invested or sucked into anything.
Hope you're day is going well ❤️❤️
Lol meant that as a reply to jor, not myself 😉