Hello comrades and welcome to the last improvement megathread of July! 
As usual, some discussion ideas:
- Do you want to share something you've done in the previous week? Everything counts, nothing is too small.
- Do you have any plans or goals for next week?
- Do you have any streaks? For example, "sober for one day." Feel free to post your streak every day in this thread.
- If you don't have a continuous streak, did you manage to abstain from something for a day or more?
- Did you come across some useful information or resource that might help others?
Poster caption: "Woman, to the locomotive!"
Good luck with your goals! 
Rough week this past week. This was the closest I came to drinking again out of a sheer sense of despair. I'm tired of feeling like I'm stagnating in life. I've made improvements for sure but from time to time it all just feels meaningless and like I'm not really doing much. I wish I had a formal education. I wish I had a job that paid enough to actually afford real things. I wish my life was different. But some of that really isn't possible to change and that feeling is what brought me low.
I didn't end up drinking. Instead, I did some borderline reckless shit and took my motorcycle off-road for a bit. It was immensely fun and did help bring me out of my funk but I can't help but think that I've replaced one borderline self-destructive coping mechanism for another. It was sweet as hell though and off-roading is absolutely something I will seek out more.
I need to find a physical outlet again since just doing body weight exercises is boring as hell to me. And I hate going to the gym because it's always crowded as shit and a cesspool of breathing each others air. I want to rock climb again but the price is a huge disincentive for how regularly I would want to be going. Thankfully my job still keeps me active but I'd prefer something more recreational and not just moving 5000 lbs stacks of barrels.