I woke up almost 3 hours earlier than usually, and pretty much immediately had to start going off on my doctor about my lexapro. Chilled for a while after, did small things around the house, napped, and just got back from a not-quite-practice sesh with the bands drummer. We mostly just hooked my amps up to different speakers and played with different gain pedals to get good tone for recording.

I dunno, things have just felt....off all day. Sitting in the twilight with the corgi rn and the feeling still hasn't gone away.

Oh well, I guess shrug-outta-hecks

  • RyanGosling [none/use name]
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    edit-2
    27 days ago

    This happened to me once. I believe it was an episode of depersonalization or whatever the other one is. Either way, I was writing an essay and suddenly everything felt strange and off. Like a switch activated and suddenly I “became” aware of my environment, my body, my fingers. Everything seemed foreign. I mean, I recognized that I was staring at a computer, staring at my fingers, my room. Yet it felt like I had suddenly been beamed to a life that wasn’t mine. Essentially, hillary-apartment

    I eventually just laid on the ground and stared at the ceiling. After 20 or so minutes I snapped back to reality and realized I needed to finish my essay. I was in high school and didn’t do any drugs.

    • GeorgeZBush [he/him]
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      edit-2
      27 days ago

      No wonder your username is RyanGosling because you're just like me fr fr.

      Something similar has been happening to me on and off for over a year. First happened while I was driving and it was terrifying. Like I was hyperaware of everything and how fragile consciousness is. I still can't fully articulate the feeling. It felt like the world around me was a movie, and at any second it could all just blink out of existence.

      • RyanGosling [none/use name]
        ·
        27 days ago

        It felt like the world around me was a movie, and at any second it could all just blink out of existence.

        Sometimes I feel like some celestial being is mindlessly changing the astral channels with its remote, landing on my channel, watching for a few minutes (thus taking over and making me feel like an alien) and realizing it’s boring, then switching to the next channel.

      • rootsbreadandmakka [he/him]
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        edit-2
        27 days ago

        It felt like the world around me was a movie, and at any second it could all just blink out of existence.

        Went through an entire semester like this in college, I don't know how I managed to get through it. I ended up taking the next semester off though, which was nice. It seems to be linked to anxiety for me, when my mind is just constantly "on" and running with no rest, it's like I guess I get laser focused on my inner thoughts and inner world, and the rest of the world becomes distant. I definitely used the movie comparison, and I would especially compare it to floating through a dream. I'd get really fearful whenever something out of the ordinary happened, like I remember once waking up from a nap and my family had all left the house, although I didn't know they were leaving or where they went. Got really scared that I had been imagining everyone for years and that I was the only person who existed. Then I called them and they still existed, I forget where they actually were, but I was just extermely on edge for the better part of that year.