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my transition was weird. in appearance, i seemed to have a weird back and forth. first i started out a twink, then a femboy, then so androgynous that i got hit on by both straight men and women, followed up with passing and not passing intermittently. now it seems im just passing all the time even though I feel like i don't look much different than a year ago when things were stop and go.
looking back on my pics, i obviously look way different 4ish years into hrt. than i did 1st or 2nd year. but its still hard for me to not look at things like my chin or my lips and be like 'MAN'.
i mean the obvious reason that i'd envy the boug is i want a vagina and a boug could get one.
and tbh i wish i could see me the way my boyfriend sees me. he's a very handsome guy, very strong, can throw me across the room very easily. he thinks that i'm way out of his league and has been consistent on that. he thinks i look like a supermodel or something and i just don't see it. i look like a sick person with tremors imo.
yeah i seemed to have issues with spiro so that has been causing me some hormonal issues lately. like my body suddenly decided it didnt like it.
and maybe i can be. like id only know for certain that i had dysmorphia if i got surgeries done i think. if im still angry with my body id accept it was definitely dysmorphia.
hrt makes me feel so good in comparison to how i was before that i know for certain that i am never stopping it, so theres also a chemical dysphoric component to my situation i think
yeah the antiandrogens are kinda gnarly but i worry about messing up my srs if i go for testicle removal before it. i'm just not lucky when it comes to surgeries
my transition was weird. in appearance, i seemed to have a weird back and forth. first i started out a twink, then a femboy, then so androgynous that i got hit on by both straight men and women, followed up with passing and not passing intermittently. now it seems im just passing all the time even though I feel like i don't look much different than a year ago when things were stop and go.
looking back on my pics, i obviously look way different 4ish years into hrt. than i did 1st or 2nd year. but its still hard for me to not look at things like my chin or my lips and be like 'MAN'.
i mean the obvious reason that i'd envy the boug is i want a vagina and a boug could get one.
and tbh i wish i could see me the way my boyfriend sees me. he's a very handsome guy, very strong, can throw me across the room very easily. he thinks that i'm way out of his league and has been consistent on that. he thinks i look like a supermodel or something and i just don't see it. i look like a sick person with tremors imo.
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yeah i seemed to have issues with spiro so that has been causing me some hormonal issues lately. like my body suddenly decided it didnt like it.
and maybe i can be. like id only know for certain that i had dysmorphia if i got surgeries done i think. if im still angry with my body id accept it was definitely dysmorphia.
hrt makes me feel so good in comparison to how i was before that i know for certain that i am never stopping it, so theres also a chemical dysphoric component to my situation i think
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yeah the antiandrogens are kinda gnarly but i worry about messing up my srs if i go for testicle removal before it. i'm just not lucky when it comes to surgeries
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yeah they can, i just have bad scarring issues so i fear the worst if its not all in one go
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