I can't deal with this. My partner of 5 years left , I have no job I have no family that gives a shit I have nothing I am done. I'm never goin to find love again because I'm a miserable unnatractive piece of shit and I can't even look I don't know how to date even if I did I'd just be burdening someone else with me it'd be so much better if I could just die but I'm such a fucking coward I can't do it I might pick up hard drugs to die slower I cant do this
Please take all the time you need and do whatever it is you truly need for you, irrespective of the wishes and whims of the sick "society" that failed you, such that you stay.
The society lives in my head. I've been a socialist coming on a decade now and I still have the pressure from things I don't believe at all living in my head , telling me I'm an atomized individual that doesn't have value to be exchanged , that the state wants me dead because I come from nothing and I don't provide enough value to capital. I wish I was strong enough to fight back