I haven't felt anything besides low burning self contempt for years. Emotions like sadness and happiness elude me. I haven't sincerely shouted for joy or wept in years. I also have no desire to get close to other people and form relationships. This makes it nigh impossible for me to give a shit about even important things. While I don't feel much pain anymore, I also lack the spark that makes life worth living. I feel like a soulless automaton.

Does this sound like it's related to neurodivergence? I'm 100% depressed, but years of therapy and various different medications haven't done much, so I feel like there must be more to it.

  • dualmindblade [he/him]
    ·
    1 month ago

    I haven't sincerely shouted for joy or wept in years.

    This implies that you haven't always felt this way. If so, well you might or might not be neurodivergent, but your complaint is a consequence of treatment resistant depression.