this stems from another conversation on this site.

a commenter used the pronoun "they" because they didn't know the gender. Commenter could have looked at an inactives users profile to see the pronouns were she/her, but they didn't.

So the question is: is it wrong to use pronoun "they" when you simply don't know or needed to know the gender? I was told that "liberals" use it aggressively/offensively to trans people, but most liberals i know aren't smart enough to know about pronouns and how to use them properly.

I've been using "they" to admit gender ignorance all the fuckin time so im just trying to see if im wrong or not. Because ive never heard of this before. and i thought this site had told me everything by now lol

edit: thank you all for the comments. ill certainly try to remember to check pronouns of inactive accounts before i talk about them, but we need to be able to debate from a reasonable position and jumping to "HOW DARE YOU SAY THEY YOU LIB" isn't going to do shit. Lenin created schools to educate workers, Hexbear is our school. and i fucking love this school.

  • kristina [she/her]
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    edit-2
    1 year ago

    im too big of a airheaded bimbo to remember pronouns so i try to avoid referring to people or use they/them. obviously i dont like being referred to as they/them, i prefer she/her, but in a space with many trans people its best to avoid potential friendly fire and i accept they/them use in that limited context

    • Cummunism [they/them, he/him]
      hexagon
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      edit-2
      1 year ago

      if they know your preferred pronoun and do it on purpose, that's fucked. but we need a way for people to admit ignorance and/or not offend anyone. "They" is the nice middleground. Every chud could just say "they" for the rest of time and in my view that would be huge.

      There is way more power in admitting to being stupid than being a know it all. We should embrace people who are like "ah fuck i don't know and that's ok." They have to accept our pronouns, we have to accept they are 15 years(or more) years behind us. Id like to throw all shitheads into the pit but it's probably slightly unrealistic. Lenin had schools to educate people, HexBear should be considered a school for chuds until the person has been determined unsaveable. Re-education is good.

      • kristina [she/her]
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        edit-2
        1 year ago

        nah its mostly on a remembrance basis in our lgbt center. we generally just do they/them when in a place of ignorance. obviously in cishet places im she/her because i pass and am kinda a stereotypical she/her. i regularly forget faces and names all the time... it makes me sad. chomsky-yes-honey

        • Cummunism [they/them, he/him]
          hexagon
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          edit-2
          1 year ago

          oh ok that makes sense. in real life there is way more layers to this of course. on the internet we're all just reading words with no tone or emotion in them and that was the main issue for me here.

          • kristina [she/her]
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            1 year ago

            oh yeah nah on the internet it can be right next to your name, if they fuck it up eat their brains