Hm, it just occurred to me that politicians could say they oppose genocide.

I totally agree. I tend to argue on your side, I am simply compelled to disagree with people.

Yes for autism but somehow my grandma got diagnosed with ADHD years ago and no one else decided to look into it. My other side is pretty ND seeming but no diagnoses.

Some ADHDers can probably live like that. Some, like myself, have pretty bad understimulation, but I guess I have yet to see if stimulants make me feel ok.

Iirc blitzed says meth was very common among the German populace before the war.

“I don’t care if your third eye is open if you don’t care about other people.” I may one day check those out. Probably preferable to the boring stuff about neurons and meditation I’m reading.

I love the ideas so it’s sad to me when people don’t like Buddhism, but considering how much class society has corrupted it in practice I understand. Books are nice but I don’t think I could trust any real life religious leaders at this point. I don’t really trust any neurotypical with handling the dharma responsibly as long as we don’t live in socialism. There’s this Tibetan monk I watch on YouTube and it’s fascinating the obvious (to my autistic Marxist brain) critiques he makes of normie spiritual seekers. It seems like they just immediately put their trust in anyone with fancy robes. And of course this critical thinking guy is still saying there is no way to practice nearly as good as with a teacher. Meanwhile his tradition is riddled with contradictions. Sure there’s badass ascetics, but they also had a society of 98% slaves not too long ago. He’s all about lineage holders and maybe there are cool ones, but even he acknowledges that there’s a bunch of rich lamas who take a ton of money to mispractice.

Edit: probably not going to retain the details, but reading your past Buddhism effort posts are pretty interesting

I’m not particularly sectarian and still investigating various schools and such, but screw non-judgment, I hate seeing mainstream and new age bullshit where people just want to be happy all the time. I don’t trust anyone who isn’t a communist or a monk when it comes to this stuff (well, actually not a fan of religious institutions either for the most part). Whenever I hear some self help - if “science based” thing talking about certain benefits of meditation I cringe. Fuck blissing out or making illusions more comfy, I’m in this for insight into the true nature of reality. Even advice to lean into the good feelings of meditation by more trusted sources I contradict. I perpetually suffer, and suffering makes a better object of meditation than whatever bs.

That experience sucks. I’m glad I came at this from a philosophically informed place while learning about AuDHD.

Edit: also gotta hate pseudo eastern bs that tries to embolden the self. Like I get people have self esteem issues and people need help with that, but it’s silly to aim to think highly of “yourself” when the goal of these source traditions is to reduce suffering by realizing the illusory nature of that idea. Relatedly “mindfulness” and “mantras” as excuses to be selfish and ignore interconnection. No the Buddha was not trying to enhance fucking hedonism. No you shouldn’t ignore your “judgement” about the immorality of something. We should be striving to be bodhisattvas feeling the suffering of the world. The utter perversion of ruling class dominant ideology cooptation.

Maybe. It’s hard to be consistent with it but my mind loves to do things in the background and while it’s recently been pondering pointlessly at times I have had it frequently coming back to the present moment: proprioception, observing sensations, insight into non-self, impermanence, and unsatisfactoriness. It has been pleasant at times. Lately, I’ve been listening to Buddhist audiobooks to help with initiating mindless tasks. I’ve also found that the insight practice of asking where the self is can help with anxiety and pain.

Show

http://www.wearesentience.com/uploads/7/2/9/3/7293936/progressive-stages-of-meditation-on-emptiness.pdf

Mindful eating is weird with ADHD. The cringey (in my contrarian opinion) basic mcmindfulness approach makes it sound like you’re savoring everything perfectly and super satisfied and interested. I do try to avoid eating mindlessly, but even when I’m paying attention I usually eat super fast and instead of noticing all the sensory “realness” I tend more towards the insight of “shit this sucks, it’s constantly changing and not real and doing nothing for my understimulation and yet my executive dysfunction will keep making me do it fruitlessly.”

“Tomahawk” more like tomahawk tuah. (I can’t stop thinking this whenever I see the title)

Fair enough

I always feel like Thai is a scam for its excessive rice and noodles (flavor and nutritional valueless). Refrying it with a bunch of vegetables is pretty awesome tho.

Ah, I think the problem in your case is that you actually do it in relation to the fear of losing something. I don’t actually think I’ve lost something, I just feel bad and have done the compulsion of checking whatever multiple times before I even think about it. /s

Simply anxiously check in perpetuity. I do this even with bags and solid pockets.

I enjoy the novelty of meditating in shorts and a t shirt in the cold rain in public.

I love how there are different paths to enlightenment like Teks for growing mushrooms. Some people talk about them very similarly and it makes me happy.

Eh, it’s a dialectic. I am perpetually coming up with things to say and I rarely find the opportunity to say any of it. I just need to work on greetings or something ig.

I can talk ok but I do not know how to approach someone, acknowledge them without being first acknowledged, or build relationships let alone looking most people in the eye without getting pretty anxious. Even when I’m lucky not to initiate I’ve only felt “connected” to people for very brief moments.

Pay dues -> get aid? I guess if it’s for those in need in the group it’s like a co-op bank or something?