WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]

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Joined 7 months ago
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Cake day: May 6th, 2024

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  • A threat about such a topic is gonna attract people with similar experiences. Personally, I don't think my lack of attraction has change significantly. Can't say I don't notice some things about men on occasion now I didn't before, but it doesn't seem like its really attraction. If anything, its probably more like me noticing certain feminine features despite the clear lack of attraction, which I assumed pre-egg-crack (or even re-realizing I was ace) was mostly just because of comphet. If it turns out I'm wrong about having a lack of attraction and actually being attracted to men, it wouldn't really surprise me given what my pre-egg-crack sexual fantasies often were like - it wouldn't really be a change in who I was attracted to or even repression related to internalized homophobia, but just due to discomfort with myself (primarily my body, but also just roles I felt like I was expected to fulfil if I were to be in such relationships).


  • The appointment went well. I was super nervous, but everyone was supportive. I really liked my clinician, and she said that PP was taking steps to try to get its patients stockpiles of treatment if it looks like HRT access ends up being threatened by the new admin.

    Glad to hear that. I think next time I talk to them is the start of January, but I might see about having towards the end of December because of this. Hopefully the next admin doesn't make it harder for people to get their levels checked. It can take some time to figure out what works for you.







  • Visited parents and mom had to go take care of something, so finally was alone with step-mom for the first time since told them I changed hormones. So she asked me about goals, name, etc, which is cool even if I have no concrete goals or plans to change name for now.

    My brother later told me our mom has asked him about things like name (my name is based on hers, so not surprise that would be a focus of hers), but I guess she doesn't want to ask me directly? Not sure if because I have a history of clamming up or because I can be overly sensitive and she's afraid of offending me accidentally - either and/or both make sense given how I've been in the past. She hadn't said anything to me in like the 3 weeks since I came out, so happy to know she's at least showing some interest and not just trying to pretend it isn't happening. Given the type of media she consumes, I'm kinda just glad she hasn't tried sending me things like detransition propaganda videos.

    Also, suddenly finding emotions being a lot stronger these last couple days... like getting tears for little reason (fortunately, so far pretty much just when alone). Kinda nostalgic, except as a child, I had even less understanding why I was upset.










  • Urinals are convenient, especially if you you are using the men's bathroom anyways. Sometimes there's like one stall that's already being used. I still use them when the bathrooms are pretty empty, but because tucking, it makes it a little more awkward if others are there.

    At home, I often pee while standing, partly because my roommate always puts the seat up when he's done (even if he poops) and sometimes I just don't feel like putting it down.

    Haven't used a women's restroom in public that isn't a one-person-only bathroom (and other guys frequently use it if the men's restroom is occupied).