thinking about how in a time of need when i lost my housing no longer had income had to move back in with my abuser and i didn't have anyone to rely on, that an east asian self proclaimed marxist "friend"(no more) of mine decided to randomly not be friends with me anymore because they thought my "mental health was horrible" (who's mental isn't completely fucked rn, if it wasn't then THAT would be the problem + my mental is definitely better than the average person bc i deprogrammed and unpacked immensely and i deal with it in much healthier ways than most) from the advice of their 99% white peers (whom DONT know me) after they decided to move to one of the most notoriously white bubbled towns in the US. and urged me to "get help and fix it" as if i was some seeping toxic biohazard. i'm my own number one critic but i know they were just putting shit on me that didn't have to do with me. it's so easy for people with darker skin to be villanized and become the scape goat not just from white people but other "poc" literally for just existing and still being exceptional compared to literally any cracker. i'm tired of having to be the absolute best and holding myself to the highest standards just to be shown a little fucking love, or at this rate be treated like a human being. it's funny because i'm genuinely in love with myself and who I am and the journey i've been through means everything to me and i'm determined to see it through the way i want to just like everyone else gets to without scrutiny, and for some reason the world really fucking hates that.
afters [none/use name]
- 5 Posts
- 101 Comments
genre is fake and straight
imagine this.. until i was an adult never rly had to encounter or deal w white people wherever i lived.. xcept 80% of my teachers were white l o l
as i get older it seems like no matter how hard i try i will inevitably end up in prison, homeless, or dead before any chance of living a life of peace, having space of my own, knowing what genuine love (platonic and non) feels like. and any attempt against it just delays the inevitable
i'm completely invisible.. and not uniquely so. many other people are and were as well. they were ignored and neglected and fell through the cracks, and its only a matter of time til i vanish as well.
<3 felt, still looking for my chosen family
heck yea itx gang! it looks like your gpu is sagging a bit btw unless im tripping
buses still have to navigate traffic among cars and get insanely packed for the rush hours + you should see the way some of these MTA drivers drive, i almost got clipped by a bus just standing on the sidewalk
Lol didn’t rick james write this
Lol this is really real we’ve really arrived at this point in time hahahaha ha ha.
Not surprised at all yet still deeply disturbed
Tbh you should stop thinking about what you can do to appeal to this person and instead entertain thoughts of what can they do to appeal to you, just focus on the sensation of the experience itself, how certain things make you feel, its an opportunity to learn about yourself more than anything
- afters [none/use name]to
·19 days agomight have to be this massive chune big up the uk
I also thought yall werent allowed here
Thats what happens when you skip butthole day
working with kids in brooklyn is the only reason i understand half these new terms
:(