Generally speaking, I get the feeling I should stick to something that isn't worth enough for felony theft charges to apply, so no RTX 4090 or 4080. The 4070 Ti isn't at all a bad deal for $0.00, so I suppose that's the one.
I've heard conflicting reports on how likely Amazon is to refund you if you simply claim the box showed up with a brick in it. I've also seen conflicting reports on whether or not they'll actually check if a return has the same serial number on it. What say you, Hexbear?
Honestly, just get a used 3090 on Ebay. The mid and lower tier Ada (40-series) cards are just bad on their own merits. Ampere (30-series) is still fine, and buying secondhand means you aren't giving Nvidia money.
If the issue is also affordability, get a used 3060, preferably the 12GB one. Still has respectable performance and is good for its price point, better than any Ada cards on value.