OK this is my list. But first, I need to say that this isn't a condemnation of those into such thing. They just don't vibe with me.

  1. Cannot get into ASMR. I've tried. Often its women 20 years younger than me, rubbing their fingernails on hairbrushes. The intentional sounds they make with their lips and fingers are things that would make me want to change seats on a bus.
  2. Instagram. I was maybe the last person to get a smart phone. It was probably 2016. I'm just fully lazy to take photos of stuff. This is a real issue when I'm single and I need to start putting photos on dating sites, as all pics of me in my phone are me squeezing carrots in my nostrils and similarly goofy things.
  3. My students' taste in anime. I try to be all cool and show off my cool taste in anime, maybe drop a Azumanga Daioh clip. It's all ancient history for 17 year olds.
  4. Photo and videos done in portrait mode. I guess I don't watch videos on the go. See #2

Things that the kids these days do better:

  • Usually better opinions on current events than people my age
  • I wish that cosplay existed when I was a teen. The default when I was younger was drugs.

If anyone insults the kids, I will visit you at your home and do an adventure-time

  • Alaskaball [comrade/them]A
    ·
    5 months ago

    Basically my youth. The only dangerous thing I ever encountered was the fucking swarms of mosquitos and the neighbor kids playing pranks on me like trying to convince me a nugget of moose shit was a cookie.

    It tasted like wood.

    • Frank [he/him, he/him]
      ·
      5 months ago

      : p I never got got with moose poop, but there was definitely some intra-tweenage warfare going on.

      lol back in the day I nearly burned down the "woods" behind our house fucking with mosquito coils. I hate mosquitos with the fury of ten thousand haters. The only good thing about them is growing up in AK, I can laugh at folks in the lower 48 any time they say "The mosquitos are real bad out here!"

      • Alaskaball [comrade/them]A
        ·
        5 months ago

        to be fair I was like 3 or 4 when I got got by the neighbor kids.

        I've also accidentally almost burnt down or blown up the woods in a few neighborhoods because either unsupervised camping and making campfires, got out hands on fireworks, got our hands on gunpowder, got our hands on gasoline, got our hands on butane, etc.

        Now that I think about it I'm surprised none of us actually got seriously injured with all the dumb shit kids do.