So I've been in a relationship for a while where it feels like I am much better at navigating my partner's feelings and supporting them in hard times than they are for me. I'll give a recent example of what I mean, and here I should put a content warning for a deceased pet.

My partner's last childhood dog recently passed away, she was getting pretty old and was in failing health for a bit. When she died it wasn't a terrible shock but it was very sad. My partner got some remembrances from the cremation and upon receiving them was very upset. They didn't want to just hide the remembrances away somewhere because it felt disrespectful but also couldn't deal with it at that time. So I stepped in, said, OK, I'll take them, they're going to be kept out in the open, not hidden, but I will hold them for you until you're ready to reach a more permanent solution. Pretty good response if you ask me.

Now flip the script, say I'm the one in need. My partner doesn't have anything other than cliches or proposed solutions to my problems that clearly aren't well thought out and are effectively useless. I feel very unsupported emotionally a lot of the time.

But it isn't just this relationship. I feel this throughout my life. I've wondered at times if this is a performed gender roles sort of thing. I'm a man and nobody has said to me directly "you're a man just don't have problems lmao" but it does at times feel like we are dancing around that implication. I don't know. Just curious if other people have experienced this because I'm sick of needing to be the mature party in my relationships. If I cut off everyone that made me feel this way I'd be alone.

  • iminsomuchpainv2 [he/him]
    hexagon
    ·
    2 months ago

    Wow what a coward, I dare you to come back and tell us all about your brilliant ideas about women and see how it goes in the MarKetPlaCE oF iDeaS

    downbear

      • iminsomuchpainv2 [he/him]
        hexagon
        ·
        2 months ago

        Yes, yes, "I'm not owned, I'm not owned"

        Buddy, you cannot communicate effectively. Nobody understood what you were trying to say, not because you're a genius, but because you can't write clearly. Well, maybe you could if you were being direct, but if you said things too directly I think the misogyny charges would stick just a bit too well, wouldn't they?

          • iminsomuchpainv2 [he/him]
            hexagon
            ·
            2 months ago

            Hey you had the chance to explain yourself and instead you deleted your posts like a coward. If you weren't a psychologically weak person afraid of being exposed as a fraud you'd say what you really think. A little pressure in response to a poorly written post and you collapsed. You can't handle pressure. Prove me wrong and expose yourself, we all dare you