Beijing just can’t wait for the U.S. to get out of the way.

"China plans to launch KushCoin, the first cryptocurrency tied to the value of cannabis, using Afghanistan as a brand ambassador. Afghanistan is naturally a choice partner for this opportunity of a lifetime due to their rich history of cannabis cultivation."

Wow, good job China.

  • happybadger [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    "I have personally been to Kabul", Chairman Xi said through a translator during a speech commemorating the 100th anniversary of the CCP's founding. "They have this strain called Afghani. It is named after the country and smells really good, so you know this was destined. Imagine a world where Afghanis can sell Afghani, haha, haha, but seriously people might like that and then buy more of it which makes the price of KushCoin go up. Socialism will come faster if we are all richer, you know. You know." Plans for KushCoin have reportedly been in development since early 2021 when China observed Gamestop stock drastically increase in value and realised how rich they could have gotten if they did more online things. When revealed as the "BIG plan for Afghanistan" that is "worth billions", Chairman Xi was quick to point out to critics that he chose that wording because it rhymes and it's a lot of money.

      • happybadger [he/him]
        ·
        3 years ago

        If they refuse to read the article, I'll read it for them. My plan is better than whatever nerd shit some journalist wrote anyway.