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Folks, have you ever heard of Ali? He was a caliph. The best caliph, some would say. I would say that. I would, I would. Ali was a winner. He won almost as much as I did, and believe me, I win a lot. He invented Shia Islam, and let me tell you, there is nothing quite like Shia Islam. It is essential, folks, essential, that America emulate Ali as much as possible. Sunni Islam is for LOSERS. Take a look at what's going on in the middle east. Take one, right now. Have a look at it. There's Iran, a good country, very highly educated, beautiful women, and it's Shia. Then there's Saudi Arabia, a terrible country folks, completely awful, and it follows Sunni Islam. They - and this is true, believe me - believe that Abu Bakr was the first caliph. Lu-di-crous. And, I know you won't believe it folks, since I certainly didn't, but Sunni Arabia controls the Hejaz, and it controls the two holy mosques. I know, I know. America must help its proud Shia allies in Iran and reclaim the two holy mosques for Ali. ʾIn shāʾ Allāh.