I feel like this is the right answer. Honestly I spent half my life trying to be masculine in some way, and all the extra work was me trying to be accepted by my dad and other male figures. Now I'm at the point of having zero respect for their version of masculinity, and it's so liberating to just be me.

Dunno if there's some male figures that are denying you acceptance, but give it a thought. I feel like it's very common.