ok, people might not always say "you're making uncomfortable right now with X and Y action", but you usually will be able to tell somebody is not comfortable with you. and honestly, don't get caught up on it, there is only so much you can do. if somebody tells you to stop then stop, but like aside from that :shrug-outta-hecks: just be yourself and if people aren't into that then they aren't into that
if somebody tells you to stop then stop, but like aside from that :shrug-outta-hecks: just be yourself and if people aren't into that then they aren't into that
More advice about being myself. Gee, can't I be someone more confident? /s
My last question is: is there a tone change in flirting? Do people like, shift body language, talk different, use a secret phrase? How do I know they're in "flirt mode"? I know this is all novice stuff, but I'm really a novice.
flirting is very context dependant, and playing around with it is part of the 'game' of flirting. it's impossible to pin down what is and what is not flirting without knowing the people, the situation between them, the social context, and so on. a big part of flirting for some people IS the fact you can't tell if they are flirting or not and that's their whole thing, playing coy about flirting. it really is just the kinda thing you can only learn by going in head first and learning from experience
I'll guess I'll have to mess up a bunch, then? And people will just... what, string me along, leave me guessing? Great. I'll be making a lot of mistakes early on, won't I? To think, a guy who’s been raised to not make a mistake, getting told he’ll have to make tons of mistakes to learn, and that I can't just "ace it" first time.
ok, people might not always say "you're making uncomfortable right now with X and Y action", but you usually will be able to tell somebody is not comfortable with you. and honestly, don't get caught up on it, there is only so much you can do. if somebody tells you to stop then stop, but like aside from that :shrug-outta-hecks: just be yourself and if people aren't into that then they aren't into that
More advice about being myself. Gee, can't I be someone more confident? /s
My last question is: is there a tone change in flirting? Do people like, shift body language, talk different, use a secret phrase? How do I know they're in "flirt mode"? I know this is all novice stuff, but I'm really a novice.
flirting is very context dependant, and playing around with it is part of the 'game' of flirting. it's impossible to pin down what is and what is not flirting without knowing the people, the situation between them, the social context, and so on. a big part of flirting for some people IS the fact you can't tell if they are flirting or not and that's their whole thing, playing coy about flirting. it really is just the kinda thing you can only learn by going in head first and learning from experience
I'll guess I'll have to mess up a bunch, then? And people will just... what, string me along, leave me guessing? Great. I'll be making a lot of mistakes early on, won't I? To think, a guy who’s been raised to not make a mistake, getting told he’ll have to make tons of mistakes to learn, and that I can't just "ace it" first time.
yeah, that's just life fam. you fuck up and you learn from that, there's no secret cheat code or manual to getting it right. you just need to fuck up
I dislike it. But, I guess there's no way around it.
Expect to see me feeling bad in the future about my dating fuck-ups in the megathreads, I guess.
it is what is it :shrug-outta-hecks:
:yea: