Permanently Deleted

    • KollontaiWasRight [she/her,they/them]
      ·
      3 years ago

      I stand against the constant dismissal of asexual people as real people with a real difference in how they engage with sexuality by non-ace people. Asexuality, even demisexual/grey-asexuality is based in a very different experience/engagement with sex and sexuality. Quite-frankly, there are few things as alien (and often alienating) as listening to a non-ace person explain how they experience horniness or attraction, for example. In particular, I stand against judgmental non-ace people deciding for us who and what we are in order to fit their preferences.

        • KollontaiWasRight [she/her,they/them]
          ·
          edit-2
          3 years ago

          See, you literally just said "No one is doing the thing I'm going to now do" and then did it. The patronizing dismissiveness you're engaged in is exactly what pisses ace people off.

            • KollontaiWasRight [she/her,they/them]
              ·
              edit-2
              3 years ago

              Ah, yes, the "cool kids club" which treats half the letters in its membership as inconveniences. Between bisexual erasure, trans-medical trans-people, and the way intersex and asexual people are treated, it qualifies as a "with friends like these who need enemies" situation. There is no "cool kids club" and no one is trying to get into it. We're supposed to be here to protect each other, but the reality is still just high-school lunchroom bullshit.

              What feels like mockery is being constantly told which box you fit in by people who have no idea what your lived experience is.

                • KollontaiWasRight [she/her,they/them]
                  ·
                  3 years ago

                  Bluntly, it's about everything you say around dismissing demisexual people as part of the LGBTQIA community that I'm annoyed about. The actual "you aren't part of the club" shit couldn't matter less to me. It's the failure to recognize that there is a fairly uncommon experience of asexuality that is more than just "a preference" even if it isn't part of "club" and that shapes peoples' lives in a way that they are better able to speak to you that makes me so mad at you. Particularly because you think it's all about being "part of the club" when, like I've said: fuck the club. The club shits on bisexual people, intersex people, and nonbinary people all the time. I don't give a fuck if we get to sit at the cool kids' table. I've never wanted to be there before and I sure as fuck don't now. I just don't want to listen to a bunch of people who know nothing about my life experience dictate what it does or doesn't mean to me.

                  I don't care whether it interests you that I take offense at having my life experience trivialized by an outsider. I don't care about your club. I don't care about the stupid game you're playing with membership or not. If you can't let ace people speak for themselves, then just don't talk about us. It's really easy.

            • PapaEmeritusIII [any]
              ·
              3 years ago

              As a queer trans person, the inclusion of demisexuals in LGBTQ+ does not at all dilute anything. Stop pearl clutching over nothing

            • Gay_Wrath [fae/faer]
              ·
              edit-2
              3 years ago

              As another queer enby trans person, demisexuals absolutely do not "dilute" the "queer identity". Are you really accusing a comrade here of creating an identity for clout stealing aesthetics?

            • VeganVelveeta [she/her]
              ·
              3 years ago

              If you're not a part of this community you don't get a vote in this topic at all.

            • upmysleeves [she/her,any]
              ·
              3 years ago

              Demi people diluting queerness is quite a take from you, I gotta say. Queer folk all want sexual and gender liberation, right? That's like the whole point so I dunno what you're on about

              • Pezevenk [he/him]
                ·
                3 years ago

                But I don't think the point is to make some pie bigger or smaller or share a pie. The point is to make sure people are no longer persecuted, disowned, killed etc due to shitty societal views about sexuality and gender which take a specific form. Of course someone can talk about all the other stuff but I don't think it is the right framework.