But no one walked up to you or did any equivalent thing. Nothing was directed at you. If I were talking to you one on one, I would introduce the idea and ask you about your experiences. But the expectation in a group setting like this is that people can state their own experiences and engage with the responses if they want. No one needs to be sensitive to any individual man’s insecurities here.

Like I have anger management issues. If someone comes up to me knowing this and goads me into getting pissed at them, I’m not gonna regret punching them in the face. Sure, the post-anger cooldown feels like shit, but I would have no problem telling that person they deserved it and can fuck off. But if I’m in a room where people are venting about their ex partners who had rage problems, taking that personally and remaining there until I got pissed would be my own failure. If I did take it personally, I would need to acknowledge that as an irrational thought and excuse myself if my coping techniques didn’t work.

This applies to people who haven’t begun that process as well. If a man has insecurity issues that he hasn’t started to deal with yet, him getting pissed at the mention of male insecurity is valid, but it is not healthy or good and does not justify toxic behavior as a result of those feelings. To say otherwise is to imply that all feelings and insecurities ought to be catered to and centered by others, which is the recipe for abuse.