• Edelgard [she/her]
    hexagon
    ·
    3 years ago

    And even if it didn’t, you should still be against It.

  • FlakesBongler [they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    My life got a whole lot better when I stopped being an angry macho kid

    I can wear whatever colors I want, I can sing and dance and prance about and most importantly I can be sad and vulnerable and not beat myself up over it

    Sure, I probably have too many stuffed animals now, but goddamn it, my dad didn't let me get a stuffed Jigglypuff when I was 6, I'm going to buy six hundred now

  • HodgePodge [love/loves]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    “Men should work through socialized toxic behavior”

    Men:

    :is-this:

    “Is this misandry?”

    Also based meme.

  • LangdonAlger [any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    I can't count on two hands the people who get uncomfortable or question my cis straight husband when he mentions offhandedly that other men are attractive

    • camarade [he/him]
      ·
      edit-2
      3 years ago

      the older I get the less our collective understanding of sexual orientation makes any sense to me. it's more of a spectrum than a list of hardlocked categories you roll the dice against when you are born. I for one have never felt any desire to be sexually or romantically involved with another man but damn if I can't stop ogling dudes from time to time. maybe we're all like 5% or 10% gay (and up) and that's alright.

      • LangdonAlger [any]
        ·
        3 years ago

        Alfred Kinsey like "I told everyone this like seventy years ago, we're just horny as fuck apes"

          • LangdonAlger [any]
            ·
            3 years ago

            Thus proving my point. But idk his story outside of telling a bunch of boomers that he interviewed them and they all admitted to being not very straight

      • Saint [he/him]
        ·
        edit-2
        3 years ago

        I hear this take a lot but doesn't it justify a lot of homophobia? Would all of the many gay people who have faced terrible discrimination have gone through all that if they were actually 5 or 10% hetero and could have just chosen a heterosexual relationship?

          • Saint [he/him]
            ·
            3 years ago

            Absolutely. The "being gay is a choice" line is doubly homophobic- once because it's often not a choice, and twice because even if it was, that doesn't mean it'd be wrong to make that choice. But, two things:

            One, in practice there is oppression based on the idea that gay people can choose to be straight, like gay conversion camps, and it's harmful to validate the idea that they could work, even if you're clear that you don't agree with their aim.

            And two, it imples that all the gay people who have suffered oppression have, to some extent, chosen that. And while that is true for some courageous or determined people, there are many for who it's not.

        • Edelgard [she/her]
          hexagon
          ·
          3 years ago

          Eh not really. It’s more recognizing how many people are closer to being bisexual than probably realize it.

          • Saint [he/him]
            ·
            3 years ago

            Yes that's fine. I just worry that "everyone is at least a little bisexual" or equivalent sentiments is thrown around a lot quite uncritically without any thought for what that means for gay people. What you're saying is fine, I just think people should be careful with their wording here.

            (To be fair, camarade actually said at least 5% gay specifically, rather than straight, but it's often phrased to imply nobody's completely straight or gay)

            • Edelgard [she/her]
              hexagon
              ·
              edit-2
              3 years ago

              Yeah, bisexual people have to fight for recognition in both straight and queer spaces, which I think can cause us to generalize sometimes.

  • SaniFlush [any, any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Imagine wanting to put half of the world down instead of bringing them up to equality. It's damn stupid is what it is.

  • ChestRockwell [comrade/them, any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    TFW your girlfriend attacks you for not being sufficiently enraged that you got cut off by another driver or let someone cut in line.... Why must I be expected to throw a shit fit at every perceived slight? :deeper-sadness:

  • FidelCastro [he/him]M
    ·
    3 years ago

    The reports for this post are a mixture of accurate and malding.

    Spoiler: The feminists are the accurate ones.

    • Edelgard [she/her]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      I think just like Veganism, I’m will not longer post anything with in post with the words Patriarchy or toxic masculinity.

      Also, I look forward to the 10 page reply to this comment.

      :PIGPOOPBALLS:

      • Edelgard [she/her]
        hexagon
        ·
        edit-2
        3 years ago

        Wait until they hear about vegan feminism.

        :abby-exasperation:

                    • Edelgard [she/her]
                      hexagon
                      ·
                      3 years ago

                      Nooooooooooo these feminist vegan debate bros I’m totally not misgendering so hostile no tolerance for disagreement smdh

                • Rem [she/her]
                  ·
                  3 years ago

                  Where the FUCK is our :stacy-yes: emote :soviet-huff:

                  • Edelgard [she/her]
                    hexagon
                    ·
                    3 years ago

                    Has anyone submitted one? If you have a pic, I could make it into an emote.

                    • Rem [she/her]
                      ·
                      3 years ago

                      There's this one

                      https://images.app.goo.gl/ZdveGymU8cYbyoVe6

                      And then I remember a user here submitted one based on this from tank girl a while back, but I guess it never got put in

                      https://images.app.goo.gl/64yvhbU9At5wd9zq9

            • Edelgard [she/her]
              hexagon
              ·
              edit-2
              3 years ago

              Vegan and feminist, the scariest type of “debate bro”.

              :vegan-edge: :solidarity: :feminism:

          • Edelgard [she/her]
            hexagon
            ·
            edit-2
            3 years ago

            I love Abby, she’s beautiful.

            :soviet-heart:

      • camarade [he/him]
        ·
        edit-2
        3 years ago

        you can interact with some vegans with the best of intentions and a world view that's 99% compatible with theirs and be treated exactly as if you were a reactionary hog because you think putting horses in movies isn't a big deal or something. I imagine some feminists are the same although I have not met any such people myself, online or otherwise.

        honestly I think /u/hopelesscomrade's cocerns are 100% normal, and they haven't said anything problematic in the slightest. I think implying otherwise is total bad faith. with that said they chose the time and place to share them extremely poorly.

        • HodgePodge [love/loves]
          ·
          3 years ago

          If I wanted to not be dunked on by feminists, I would simply not post misogynistic things.

                • Edelgard [she/her]
                  hexagon
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  3 years ago

                  the ways some feminists fail to include men in their version of liberation

                  For what it’s worth, this type of feminist is largely a boogey(wo)man and only found in TERF circles.

                  Wreckers are one thing, but longtime users could probably be given a more understanding explanation, even on touchy topics, without sliding into the realm of allowing misogyny/etc.

                  The info is all here on the site. Women shouldn’t have to explain why they deserve rights to anyone, especially when that person leads with defensiveness.

                  I don’t think you’re implying that or anything, I’m just reiterating that men often feel an entitlement to women’s time.

                  I’m intentionally trying not to respond to the person you’re replying to because I don’t think it will do any good and I’d rather talk about the actual subject.

                    • Edelgard [she/her]
                      hexagon
                      ·
                      edit-2
                      3 years ago

                      You’re doing the work of engaging and educating someone as (presumably) an ally after learning about the topic yourself.

                      That’s exactly how that needs to happen so that folks don’t have to constantly justify why they personally should have rights.

                      At the same time, I’m actively working to have a zero bullshit policy with sexist behavior when it comes at me. I think the combo is effective.

    • replaceable [he/him]
      ·
      edit-2
      3 years ago

      You seem to be confused about why comrade @Edelgard is angry at you so i will explain.
      Your comment implied that you disagree in some way with this meme, since you expect to receive pushback upon voicing these opinions like it had happened in the past.
      Additionally you had voiced your disagreement in a cowardly way, instead of stating it outright, and risking being wrong, you had merely implied it thus maintaining plausible deniability.
      Additionally additionally you preemptively dismissed any pushback to your disagreement, thus demonstrating your unwillingness to be proven wrong and learn.

      • Edelgard [she/her]
        hexagon
        ·
        3 years ago

        Thank you for explaining that to them. I wasn’t about to get into a “show me where I said that” argument lol

        • nohaybanda [he/him]
          ·
          3 years ago

          Wat?

          I understood the comment to mean they're tired of posting about veganism (and feminism) and getting swamped with debate bro replies, so they're self-censoring to avoid all this shit. Which is an incredibly common thing on the Internet.

            • hopelesscomrade [they/them]
              ·
              edit-2
              3 years ago

              Well after everyone showed me how misogynist I was after posting posting poop balls and telling me I'm mysogonic for not wanting to engage with them.

              I never defend myself, because their is no point, so I won't.

              • camarade [he/him]
                ·
                3 years ago

                you have lost the ironic detachment duel. sorry friend

          • LangdonAlger [any]
            ·
            3 years ago

            This is your only good post in this thread, so thanks for that. No further contributions are necessary. See you in the mega

    • FredrikFeuerstein [none/use name]
      ·
      3 years ago

      It's the same shit and not worth talking about with these people. They'd rather blame men than capitalists. We're easier to hurt.

    • Edelgard [she/her]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      Men apparently really don’t like being told that many of them have work to do.

      • princeofsin [he/him]
        ·
        edit-2
        3 years ago

        I really don't get that. Isn't someone pointing or critiquing a flaw in ones character which has a negative impact on others a good thing? Like wouldn't that be something you as a person would want to correct?

        • Dewot523 [he/him]
          ·
          3 years ago

          Okay everyone needs to work on themselves but if you don't understand how those exact three sentences you just used would be absolutely condescending and infuriating to most people you should get someone else to handle the conversations about peoples' flaws. I got instinctively angry just reading it.

          • ImSoOCD [they/them]
            ·
            3 years ago

            I know plenty of people who would react that way, but nowhere near most of them. I think I would have gotten defensive when I was younger, though.

            • Dewot523 [he/him]
              ·
              3 years ago

              There is a certain inherent level of condescension in the assumption that working on your flaws or even acknowledging them in a serious way is so easy. Especially for people actively trying to work on them.

              Like imagine walking up to a fat person, saying "Hey, you're fat. You should eat less to work on that.", and then following it up with a "why are you so angry? I work on my problems all the time!"

              Most people in most places are aware of their problems in some sense. Hypermasculine macho guys too, they're constantly insecure. But the absofuckinglutely worst way to start a conversation with the aim of helping them change things is to just point out what's wrong, because it's inherently an issue they're sensitive about.

              • Edelgard [she/her]
                hexagon
                ·
                3 years ago

                Good thing the patriarchy isn’t about them individually then

                :vivian-shrug:

              • BreadpilledChadwife [they/them]
                ·
                3 years ago

                But no one walked up to you or did any equivalent thing. Nothing was directed at you. If I were talking to you one on one, I would introduce the idea and ask you about your experiences. But the expectation in a group setting like this is that people can state their own experiences and engage with the responses if they want. No one needs to be sensitive to any individual man’s insecurities here.

                Like I have anger management issues. If someone comes up to me knowing this and goads me into getting pissed at them, I’m not gonna regret punching them in the face. Sure, the post-anger cooldown feels like shit, but I would have no problem telling that person they deserved it and can fuck off. But if I’m in a room where people are venting about their ex partners who had rage problems, taking that personally and remaining there until I got pissed would be my own failure. If I did take it personally, I would need to acknowledge that as an irrational thought and excuse myself if my coping techniques didn’t work.

                This applies to people who haven’t begun that process as well. If a man has insecurity issues that he hasn’t started to deal with yet, him getting pissed at the mention of male insecurity is valid, but it is not healthy or good and does not justify toxic behavior as a result of those feelings. To say otherwise is to imply that all feelings and insecurities ought to be catered to and centered by others, which is the recipe for abuse.

    • Edelgard [she/her]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      Oh, Fred Flintstone had another nazi coping session in the comments too.

  • Mindfury [he/him]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    look, i know cumposting might not be appropriate in the comments of a feminist meme post

    but i'm gonna cumpost at all the banned nerds lmao